"Fragments of Myself"

i've got a lot of shit in my head
that just does not make sense
all these broken memories
fragments of myself
used-to-be's and almost-had's
i couldn't quite let go
they're coming back now, all at once
and it's more than i can take

the girls who filled me up with lies
the friends who turned their backs
the drugs i tried to hide behind
with their highs that never last
the promises that all turned bad
the sting of circumstance
the sense of self i never had
and that elusive "second chance"

well, up to this point
i've lived a life of failure
and i don't think anything
is ever gonna change
i'll always be second-best
strung out and purposeless
with nothing to lose
and even less to gain

I WISH I HAD SOMETHING TO OFFER
I WISH I HAD SOMEONE TO CLING TO
I WISH I WAS SPECIAL
I WISH I WAS GOOD ENOUGH
BUT MOST OF ALL
I JUST WISH I WASN'T ME

i've run out of excuses
to make up for my mistakes
i can't seem to sugar-coat
my problems anymore
everything is winding down
in my fucked up little world
i'm wearing thin and burning out
and circling the drain

the girls who filled me up with lies
the friends who turned their backs
the drugs i tried to hide behind
with their highs that never last
the promises that all turned bad
the sting of circumstance
the sense of self i never had
and that elusive "second chance"

well, up to this point
i've lived a life of failure
and i don't think anything
is ever gonna change
i'll always be second-best
strung out and purposeless
with nothing to lose
and even less to gain

I WISH I HAD SOMETHING TO OFFER
I WISH I HAD SOMEONE TO CLING TO
I WISH I WAS SPECIAL
I WISH I WAS GOOD ENOUGH
BUT MOST OF ALL
I JUST WISH I WASN'T ME